A couple months ago I attended a local church service unaware of how my life trajectory was about to shift. Our pastor was preaching on 2 Peter 1 and taught on how to live our lives intentionally, seeking the Lord first, and convicted us to return to our first love being Christ. I felt convicted and wrote this prayer to the Lord: “Lord, as hard as it is, I surrender my schedule to you. Lord, I’m sorry for filling my schedule with working for you and others first, rather than abiding and dwelling with you first. Lord, I give you my schedule and I surrender to you.”
Later that evening I attended a church service at my home church, and during that service the pastor asked the congregation to pray about what God is calling them to move into confidently. When I asked God, I felt the words “It’s time to go” settle in my heart and mind. I responded by writing: “Lord, I’m scared that you’re calling me to go. Where? I’m unsure, but I feel as if you’re telling me, it’s time to go. Lord, please clarify this in my heart and show me where you’re leading me. I love you, Lord, and I trust you. If you’re calling me to go, I will go.”
That evening I went home and researched several different missions and service opportunities and didn’t find anywhere that I felt peace about. The next day I remembered a friend who had served on the World Race and when I clicked on the Pacific Rim route, I was filled with peace and excitement. I told my family about how God was speaking to me and they enthusiastically confirmed the call on my heart. And so, I applied, I waited expectantly, and after two weeks was accepted! And for the first time in the process felt hesitant and anxious.
I’ve wrestled for the last month and half with this hesitancy in my heart, trying to sort out if it is a hesitancy from the Holy Spirit or is my own fear and anxiety over truly surrendering my schedule and life to the Lord. As I’ve prayed and sought out the Lord and the wisdom of godly people in my life, I believe the hesitancy I’ve felt is from my own fear and anxiety over change and losing control over so many aspects of my life (i.e. food, sleep, work, time, ministry, resources, travel, independence, space, community, etc.). However, I believe that God has called us into an abundant life (John 10:10) and I know that his plans are far better than my own (Jeremiah 29:11). So, while it may not make sense to my career and where I am at in life to leave and set everything aside for a year, I don’t want to be like Jonah, called into something and refusing to go where God has called me because I think I have a better plan or am choosing to live in fear. God asked Noah to do something nonsensical and the Bible describes his response as “So Noah did everything exactly as God had commanded him” (Genesis 6:22). I believe we are all called into something by the Lord which will bring us closer to him and bring glory to him, building his kingdom. I would like to respond like Noah. The Lord has told me “It’s time to go,” and so I will go.
The World Race is an 11-month long mission trip in which we will serve and partner with long term missionaries, churches and organizations in 11 different countries. We will be joining them by supporting these missionaries and ministries with children’s, youth, and college ministries, community outreach, evangelism, manual labor, working with those impacted by substance use and addiction and sex trafficking and meeting whatever additional needs arise. To serve on this mission trip, I need partners in ministry to come along side and join me. The cost of this mission trip is $18,700 and I am looking for both prayer partners and financial partners. I am very excited to see what God will do over this next year and a half and trust his leading and provision completely. I will continue to post updates to this blog and would love to share more of my heart and answer any questions you have about this trip, the Lord or myself so please don’t hesitate to reach out! I’m praying for you and ask you to be praying for me as well. Thank you for joining me in this journey by praying for me, supporting me, and learning more of my heart.
Psalm 25:1
“O Lord, I give my life to you.”
Proverbs 3:5-6
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.”
Naiomi – we are so excited to follow your journey that God has led you on! And to see how He uses you to do His work!
Thank you so much! I love you!